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What to do when your spouse cheats


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If you have irrefutable evidence of the affair, such as text messages or emails from the other woman or credit card statements showing payments for flowers, lingerie or jewelry that were not for you, show this to him. If you don't have evidence, only suspicions, think carefully before confronting him; be prepared for him to deny an affair. Stay calm, explain how his behavior has made you feel, and ask him for complete honesty. You will have to consider the possibility that your husband will not want to end the affair.

He may tell you that he is confused and doesn't know who he wants to be with, or that he is leaving you for the other woman.

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If he can't assure you that the affair is over, that he is sorry for the betrayal and committed to rebuilding the marriage and earning your trust back, you need to accept that the relationship is over. Begging him to stay with you may be your initial reaction out of fear and insecurity, but it is not a healthy place from which to repair your broken marriage. You deserve better than that, says psychologist Phil McGraw. You need to take some time to process what has happened and what your husband has told you about the affair.

If you have children and don't want to disrupt their lives until it is absolutely necessary, ask him to sleep in another room.

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If you don't have kids to consider, or you just can't bear to be under the same roof as him, ask him to leave. He is the guilty party here, so he should be the one to go elsewhere and give you some space to work out whether you want to try to save the marriage. Don't put any pressure on yourself to make a quick decision about the future of your relationship.

What you choose to do will affect the rest of your life, your happiness, and emotional and mental health. It's not a decision that should be made in haste. Seeing a theme here?

Marital Infidelity: Recovery for Both Wounded Spouses

The more your partner lies and withholds information, the worse this is for the relationship. All the progress you made will be lost. Sheri Meyers, a marriage and family therapist , told Fox News.


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  8. Now that your partner has cheated, your relationship will never be the same. Molly Mulshine. Snapchat icon A ghost.

    – This is how you stop your partner from cheating - Esther Perel - SVT/NRK/Skavlan

    Your partner refuses to apologize. Your partner said sorry once, and thinks that should be enough. The cheater blames their actions on something other than themselves.

    10 Things You Should Never Do After Discovering A Spouse's Affair | HuffPost Life

    No one else in your life thinks the cheater deserves another chance. Your significant other still sees or contacts the person with whom they cheated — and lies about it.

    The reasons you want to stay together have nothing to do with your relationship.